Napolitano: Closing border not the answer to flu..try chicken soup….

The Hill 4/27/09;

Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano defended the government's response at a press conference Monday afternoon as reporters asked her about the risk of asymptomatic swine flu carriers entering the country.

Napolitano said that we are already identifying, detaining and isolating those who seem ill and try to cross into the United States. We're doing passive surveillance at the border and vigorously giving out yellow cards explaining the signs of swine flu and instructions on what to do about it in multiple foreign languages, including Pig-Latin, as a reporter asked if closure of the border had been considered.

Napolitano snorted "you would close the border if you thought you could contain the spread of disease, but the disease already is in a number of states within the United States so “what the heck” there goes the old “close the border strategy”. Rather we feel that we can stop any pending pandemic by issuing new color code alerts and relying on people to make the right decisions. Napolitano identified the new Pending Pandemic Color Adjusted Code Alerts as, “Strawberry (bad shit), Chocolate (so-so), and Vanilla (good shit)”. The new alerts will be referred to in the Homeland Security Intelligence circle by the code name of “Pee-Pee-Ca-Ca”.

Napolitano said this new strategy is a bi-partisan work product of our great Washington think tank and she is as confident of it working as she is confident that the 9-11 hijackers crossed the Canadian border and our returning troops may be right wing terrorists.

She also reminded people that if they felt sick to stay home from work and eat lots of chicken soup.

Blog comment; ….and what’s up with our latest Presidents?….

Hurricane Katrina = G.W.B. went to the ranch.

Swine Flu outbreak = B.O. went golfing.

(Sorry to tell you this pal but if this thing takes off, it will be 1000 times worse than Katrina).

Mayor announces Detroit’s first curbside recycling program..Monica…where are you?

“SAVE DETROIT JEWELS - dont let them shut down our incinerator”

Cranes Business Report;

Detroit Mayor Ken Cockrel Jr. today announced Detroit’s first curbside recycling program.
The one-year pilot program will begin on the city’s east and west sides in July.

The number of drop-off recycling centers and mobile centers will also be increased, according to the statement.
If the pilot program is successful, a city-wide permanent program will be implemented within two years.

Waaaaaaait a minute!!!! Does Mayor Pro-Nutzo Monica Conyers realize what this means?………

Conyers is touting the program, but wait until she puts two and two together while watching Sponge Bob commercials. THIS IS ANOTHER ATTACK ON THE FAMILY CITY JEWELS..

Mayor Pro-Nutzo will say that;

Corporate powers want to rape and pillage Detroit’s beloved trash..
The Great and Honorable Poopah Mayor Coleman Alexander Young (praised be His name) built an incinerator for Detroit’s garbage right here in Detroit. Today this incinerator is one of the city’s most precious jewels. Unfortunately, Ken Cockrel and the Suburbs are plotting to steal garbage from the peoples of Detroit so it can be recycled.”recycling is what people who don’t look like Mayor Pro-Tem Nutzo like to do” you know..like saving the earth without having to do much”. Detroiters will be forced, almost at gun point, to surrender their trash to this recycling program instead of sending it to Mayor Young’s (praised be His name) beloved incinerator. The incinerator may be forced to shut down…

The newly formed authority of Garbage Of Detroit (GOD), which used to be the Cobo Hall Regional Authority is headed by King L.Brooks Paterson and his little elfs.

GOD said recycling is fantastic! You can still buy all the stuff you like (bottled water, beer, wine, organic iced tea, and cans of all varieties) and then when you’re done you just put it in a DIFFERENT bin than where you would throw your other garbage. And boom! Environment saved! Everyone feels great, it’s so easy! People from all over the region will bring their bottles to Detroit. Smaller suburban cities that are strapped for cash can shut down their costing recycling sites saving tons of tax payer dollars. The whole region will benefit. No more terrible incinerator smoke polution. E.P.A. and it's goons will be happy.

GOD has already developed a family theme “Drop off your empties in Detroit and ride a People Mover for free”.

My-oh-my, will any of the jewels of Detroit be saved????

WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO THE MISS AMERICA CONTEST?.. “BURT PARKS..WHERE ARE YOU”?

Politically correct is in…..First Amendment is out…..

Another American tradition just bit the dust…..

If you have been watching the news this week it appears that Miss California, Carrie Prejean, may have lost the Miss America contest after she was asked about her stand on gay marriages. Basically she said that it, is great living in America where you have a choice, but added, which pissed off a lot of hetero-phobes, that she personally believes that marriage should be between one man and one woman (ummm..what an interesting thought).

Who is this person that posed this question you ask?…It was a homo-sexual judge in the contest who goes by the name of Perez “Pillow-Biter” Hilton, real name Mario Armando Lavandeira, Jr.

Why is a openly homosexual judge with a political agenda permitted to help select Miss USA when he is only known for a disgusting celeb-worshipping blog. If they are looking for judges who are bloggers, why not ask me? I think I have a better idea about women than some sissy poofter! And get this, “Pillow-Biter” Perez gets on his blog after the show and does a video and calls Prejean the “B” word and than later refers to her using the “C” word. My god, what do all the the defenders of woman’s rights think about this?

Here are a few pics of the Gay Blade himself; Nice..ay?

Give me a break…who in their their right mind would prefer a Miss America that looked like this as compared to this…

Donald Trump should be ashamed. Anyone with a comb-over that obvious should man up and go bald! He should also be ashamed since he owns the Miss USA event which was tarnished tremendously by the terrible choice of judges. I will not it watch again! Except the bathing suit competition.

Some good news, Blog has checked and has found only one supporter of Hilton…You guessed it…our very own U.S. of A. Teabagger..."The Purple People Eater” …

EPA takes first step toward climate change regs

TREES AND OTHER GREEN STUFF RULE!!!… Apr 17 11:58 AM US/Eastern By H. JOSEF HEBERT Associated Press Writer

WASHINGTON (AP) - The Environmental Protection Agency concluded Friday that carbon dioxide gases linked to climate change" endanger public health and welfare," setting the stage for regulating them under federal clean air laws. The EPA action marks the first step toward imposing limits on pollution linked to climate change, which would mean tighter rules for cars and power plants…… Blog; E.P.A. head Global Warming scientists, Dr. Moe and Dr. Joe hailed the news as a victory for all of “humanutty” but added that “it was just da baginning”…. “we werked real hard to find this stuff out..real mericans would quik breathing to cut down on that bad breath karbon dioxid stuff” (Dr. Joe and Dr. Moe have been directed by the Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi to determine if other planets in the universe are being effected by our emissions. She also directed the dynamic duo to find out how the Earth and Universe were created and is expecting a report from the two bean heads before the next Presidential election). Ya got any idea where this is going to lead? Just think about it.. Just for starts….. No more soda water, beer, sparking wine… No burning of wood. Junk you gasoline autos. No more power lawn mowers- buy a blurp-less/ fart-less goat. No more bakers yeast = no more donuts and bread. No more fire extinguishers. No more welding or pneumatics systems in factories. No more non-caffeine stuff. No more dry cleaners. Polymers and plastics out the door. Bye, Bye dry ice. Out of control PH levels in swimming pools. Taboo on all sports and love making, too much breathing. No more money- it all went to pay your utility bills. Before you know it, EPA Police will be issuing tickets for “excessive emissions” like a “ five mph over the speed limit “ ticket. _______________________________________________ Evil U.S. manufacturers also hailed the news as welcome…. ”now we can export our jobs not only for cheaper labor but we can go to countries that have no restrictions on carbon dioxide…we’ll save tons of money by not paying fines”…. A. Gore, Founder of Generation Investment Management. LLP said that his company plans on introducing a new Retro Signature fashion line look for all Global Warming patriotic families…These new face masks would not only look stylish they would contain the emission of CO2 by breathers…. Meanwhile Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Neopolitan just appointed Smokey the Bear as her “Home-boy Agent” to investigate possible ties of homeland terror to the Boy Scouts of America because of all the camp fires those arson trained nimrods start. “Yikes, fellows, more CO2 emissions…could be those disgruntled Boy Scouts?…what’ll you think Pooh?”

GLAMOUR 'FIRST' , PIZZA “SECOND”

Hey, am I missing something?.. because of our economic times and our daily lectures from our Administration and Congress…you know..like…”tighten our belts, we must all give a little for the good of all, be patriotic and pay more, use less energy, sacrifice for everybody’s good, stop bonuses, take a cut in pay, for-go a pay raise for the good of others, kill all the rich people, and basically live a humble, lucky to have an inside toilet way of life” wouldn't ya think that a full time makeup artist and a pizza flipper, flown in by big polluting jets should be be ranked at the very lower end of the feed chain?

Maybe I am being a little bit picky but when you decide to run for office and get elected you are moving into a glass house and can expect this sort of Blog.

On the other hand maybe this is the early signs of a great new sit-com which may be better than the last “Bill & Hillary At Home Show”.

Anyway, take a look at this........

FULL-TIME MAKEUP ARTIST FOR MICHELLE

New York Post, Posted: 2:34 am, April 12, 2009

She's America's top "model."

Michelle Obama is the nation's first first lady to add a full-time makeup artist to her traveling entourage, according to stylists who have worked with presidential wives over the past 16 years.

Makeup artist Ingrid Grimes-Miles, 49, helped create Obama's signature look on her inaugural trip to Europe last week.

Grimes-Miles, who has been working with the first lady for six years day and night without stopping, now splits her time between DC and Chicago, where she dolls up morning-news anchors for WGN TV.

“AFTER MAKEUP” Photos

“BEFORE MAKEUP” Photos

Blog comment; Hey, it's the White House that decided she needed a professional full-time lipsticker. Don't complain to me about it.

OBAMAS FLY IN CHEF 860 MILES…JUST TO MAKE PIZZA

Foreign Service
Last updated at 12:37 PM on 10th April 2009

When you're the president of the United States, only the best pizza will do - even if that means flying a chef 860 miles.

Chris Sommers, 33, jetted into Washington from St Louis, Missouri, on Thursday with a suitcase of dough, cheese and pans to to prepare food for the Obamas and their staff.

He had apparently been handpicked after the President had tasted his pizzas on the campaign trail last autumn.

Great honour: Chris Sommers will make 20 pizzas for the Obamas and their staff at a White House dinner

'It's surreal, it's a huge honour,' said Mr Sommers, who owns Pi restaurant in St Louis.

'It will be a casual lunch and hopefully we'll have a chance to say hello to the president.'

Mr Somers was accompanied by this business partner Ryan Mangilardo who will help prepare the dinner for 140 this evening.

It will feature his signature dishes - ten deep dish and ten thin crust creations.

He is also planning a pizza especially for the president - "The Hyde Park Revolution", shaped like the head of Reverend Wright, topped with chicken lips, mountain oysters, sardines, peanut butter, and hot sauce.

We asked a nervous White House Official Protocol Environmental Envoy (“W.H.O.P.E.E.”) what the cost was and how big the carbon footprint was in regards to flying in the chef to make the pizzas. The perspiring poker faced unidentified public protocol official said that the pizzas were prepared provincially by patriotic pre-graduate pizza preparers and the President picked up the pizzas himself and delivered them proficiently, in one of the new government pea green push-mobiles (a.k.a. Bam-Mobile) that provides 200,000 miles on one pint of peanut pulp. The official refused further comment other than “ Ali-Akbar, who ever released that story must be an infidel…errr…Republican”

Blog comment; “aah…whom to believe?????? one cannot tell who is telling the truth anymore..I guess it depends whether you are an Infidel or not?”

OBAMA’S AMESTY FOR ILLEGALS?

New York Times, published: April 8, 2009

While acknowledging that the recession makes the political battle more difficult, President Obama plans to begin addressing the country’s immigration system this year, including looking for a path for illegal immigrants to become legal, a senior administration official said on Wednesday. Obama is expected to appeal to Congress to pass Amnesty Legislation on the fact that if they do not act rapidly they will have no one to clean their bathrooms or cut their grass. Obama is hoping to seriously impact many of the Democratic leaders in Congress who can’t tell the difference between a lawn mower and a toilet bowl cleaner.

Every move that Barack Hussein Obama has made in his first 100 days in office has been, shall I say “different?”. From the unread Stimulation Bill to taking over banks and GM , to the world fuzzy-wuzzy tour where he apologized to any Muslim within earshot, bowing to the Saudi King Ali-Baba , cutting anti-missile funding the day after North Korea tests the “tae-poop-dong” ballistic missile and plans to socialize the greatest medical system in the world.

“Illegal B.V.D.s (Brown Voters for Democrats) celebrate next to a Home Depot Store”

Now he announces he is putting amnesty as a priority. Over 70% of Americans (which include “used to be non-Americans” that got their citizenship thru hard work, patience and legal means) oppose amnesty. You can’t find 70% of Americans who can agree if it is raining outside! The audacity of this guy to pursue allowing 20 million illegal's to become citizens after they have willfully broken our immigration laws, caused a plague of crime, and cost us trillions of dollars in health, welfare, education and incarceration costs. The only thing that would be more stupid is to send Guantanamo terrorists to the United States and put them on welfare! Oops….he is doing that too!

More B.V.D.s showing the newly implemented A.C.O.R.N. Fellowship hand sign

Blog Comment; Lets get serious…we all know why Amnesty is “numero uno” on the agenda…it has nothing to do with fairness, love, the right thing to do….it is for Democratic votes. This is ammo to fight the backlash that is in the horizon for the Democratic Party due to Obama and his handlers that control Congress. This may very well divide the Democratic party and may also do the same for the Republicans?

“Current Events - The Greatest Show on Earth”

Obama's Somali Pirate Hostage Crisis is an 'Annoying Distraction'

April 09, 2009

The Somali pirate situation in which the pirates took and then lost an American cargo ship and then took her captain as a hostage is being described as an "annoying distraction" for President Capt’n Barack Obama.
One wonders how Captain Richard Phillips (U.S. citizen-Vermont), now being held at gunpoint in a life boat by Somali pirates in the middle of the Gulf of Aden, would characterize the situation. To be sure, the guided missile destroyer USS Bainbridge in on the scene and a P3 Orion aircraft is monitoring the

Capt’n Obama's Somali Pirate Hostage Crisis is an 'Annoying Distraction'

situation. An FBI hostage negotiation team is providing advice to the US Navy on ways to obtain the release of Captain Phillips without resorting to armed force.
Nevertheless, while the White House is described as "working around the clock" on what has turned out to be a hostage crisis, Capt’n Obama appears to be unconcerned. At a meeting with homeowners in the White House Roosevelt Room, Capt’n Obama was asked what he thought of the Somali pirate situation and the plight of Captain Phillips. Capt’n Obama responded, "Arrgh, blimey mates, we're talking about housing right now." “My First Matey John Biden is watching the situation round de clock from his crow’s nest”

Meanwhile;

Somali Pirates Keep Hundreds of Hostages in Pirate City of EylThe

EYLTHE CITY HALL AND DOLLAR STORE

International Maritime Bureau's Piracy Reporting Center said before Wednesday's hijacking that 88 attacks have been reported in the area this year, including 36 successful hijackings. About 14 vessels — and 250 crew members — are still being held hostage. Intelligence sources believe the number of vessels held presently is about 15. This doesn’t count our own born in the good old U.S.A.,Vermont resident Captain Phillips…..

and to really show us and to add to the Captain Phillips problem---

Pirates seize U.S.-owned, Italy-flagged tugboat 11 Apr 2009 13:49:03 GMT, NAIROBI, April 11 (Reuters) - Pirates seized a U.S.-owned and Italian-flagged tugboat with 16 crew on Saturday in the latest hijacking in the busy Gulf of Aden waterway, a regional maritime group said.

CAPT’N GUMBO “NO FACE” KIDD

After the seizure Somali Pirate Gran Poopah “Capt’n Gumbo No Face Kidd” said that we demand gas money for our brother pirates who are holding Capt’n Phillips in a life boat without gasoline. “all we want is to even the playing field”...

Hey did anyone from the Bush administration pass on the fact that these pirates were classified as “real honest-to-good terrorists” just like the ones we are fighting? They are part of the Al-Shabab Organization that is tied in with Al-Qaeda 75 virgins crowd…

My Solution……..blow up the pirates, their families, their palatial estates, their pets, their friends, their Imans, the UN, and all aiders and abettors (oops, better re-think that last one?)

“ AHOY SOMOLIA PIRATE – BOOM!”

Blog comment; Maybe my solution is a tad extreme, but splain to me how this can be an “annoying distraction”? Remember we still owe these Somoli, Mogadishu shitheads a big one for “Black Hawk Down”….

Just had another thought after I posted this...Why not take the Gitmo gangster diaper-heads hostage as soon as they are released and demand that the Somolianisees take them along with the 2 million for Capt. Phillips. Heck we could make up the 2 mill in savings on welfare and healthcare for the Gitmo gangsters

Where is GWB???????

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Yarrr!!! NEWSFLASH!! Captain Phillips has been rescued and three of the ‘pirates’ rest in Davy Jones locker. Yarrr!!!

Excellant work U.S. Navy Seals!!!!!.......

N. KOREA LAUNCHES , U.S. LUNCHES…

“Look at that “Dong” mutha fry…..!!!!!

So, after an afternoon of "did they or didn't they," we have confirmation that the government in North Korea launched an Inter-Continental Ballistic Missile -- you know, one of those things that could drop a multi-megaton-sized firecracker on Tokyo, or Seoul, or ... San Francisco:

TOKYO/SEOUL (Routers) - North Korea fired a long-range rocket on Sunday, provoking international outrage and prompting the U.N. Security Council to call an emergency meeting in the middle of their tea time.

The reclusive communist state said they launched their “Kwam-my-donkey-dong-2" satellite into orbit and circled the earth transmitting revolutionary songs, old movies and Korean kartoons. But both the U.S. military and South Korea said it had failed to enter orbit.

Analysts say the launch was effectively a test of the “Tae-poop-dong-3” ballistic missile designed to carry a warhead potentially as far as Alaska, Hawaii and with any luck, San Francisco.

It was the first big challenge for U.S. President Barack “no-dong” Obama in dealing with the North, whose efforts to build a nuclear arsenal have long plagued ties with Washington.

"With this provocative act, North Korea has ignored its international obligations, rejected unequivocal calls for restraint, further isolated itself from the community of nations and is acting just like a spoiled brat," Obama said, speaking on a European tour (along with his U.S. entourage of 500 staffers, cooks, security, nannies, landscapers, doctors, lawyers and candle stick makers.)

Therefore President “no-dong” Obama stated that “he'll show that bad-bad little fuzzy bear”.. by committing himself to reducing the U.S. nuclear arsenal and said Washington would seek to engage all nuclear weapons states in arms reduction efforts. “This will make him think twice about shooting off another “Dong” missile without first checking in with the U.N.”

North Korea Top Dong, Kim “Long-Johns” Jong said.. “every country has a right to watch Korean Kartoons and old TNN movies from a satellite, what you think…only Amerika has television?”

Former President GWB commented on today's news while attending a family B-B-Q in Wacko, Tx.. “ if I was still in power, I wood’d preevented that little slope-head from launching one of them Dongs by making Moo-Soo-Goo out of it before he could say “No tickee, No washee”…

Blog comment;

President Obama finds himself in a difficult situation in the wake of Jong’s “Dong” missile launch: to do nothing other than issue statements (the preferred plan of liberal internationalists everywhere) make us look weak and encourages the bandits in Pyong-yang-dong…or to react with some type of force and get most of South Korea and Japan knocked off meanwhile us winning the whole tamale.

We must remember that Kim is reportedly a big film buff, and his strategy comes from the 1959 movie "The Mouse That Roared," about a fictional poor country that declares war on the U.S., expecting to lose and get aid like the Marshall Plan that Washington used to help rebuild its World War II foes but in this case it would be the Democratic ever-giving Stimulation Plan..

I suspect our president is, like most liberal internationalists, someone who wishes the real world would go away and leave him free to re-invent America as he and Nancy Pelosi wishes, other than for the occasional international conference. Trouble is, that ain’t never going to happen…..

CONYERS - THE NEVER ENDING STORY

“Ya’ll reporters are trying to trick me…I said Reggie Esters wasn’t my mother…. not my brother….I ain’t got no strings, what's wrong with helping an ex-con?…We may all be one some day….””

April 2, 2009

Detroit --A top city official says City Council President Monica “Moon-beam” Conyers pulled strings to get her brother, an ex-con with a violent record, a job in the building department that was to last only 120 days but was extended for two years. "She came up to me, handed me his resume and said 'You should hire him. He's a good guy,'” said Amru Meah, director of Building & Safety Engineering. Reggie “Big Guns” Esters, 38, was fired from the $30,500 job last summer on claims because of chronic absenteeism. About the same time, he was charged with 10 felonies stemming from allegations he brandished a shotgun at two people, according to court records. He pleaded guilty to one count and faces sentencing April 17.

Meah said “Moon-beam” wanted her brother hired as a $50,000 inspector, but he wasn't qualified and wouldn't pass a license exam. Instead, he was hired as an investigator who checked if businesses are properly licensed. (This sounds like the right job for him…you know, like a mob enforcer like you see in the movies?)

“Moon-bean”, whose maiden name is Esters, said Meah is wrong. She denied that Esters is her brother.

April 3, 2009

Detroit --One day after denying it, City Council President Monica Moon-beam Conyers acknowledged that Reggie Esters, the ex-con she helped get a job in City Hall, is her brother and not her mother. She said that she misunderstood the question. She thought the reporter said mother and not brother when asking about the incident with Meah. “The dummy reporter wrote it down wrong, I said Reggie was not my mother.

Since then, “Moonbeam’s” Chief of Staff, Denise Tolliver, released a statement attributed to “Moon-beam” saying she's an advocate for helping those who have been incarcerated get their lives back on track. (WTF…..”Moon-beam” has a “Chief of Staff” ?. In her case it is something like an insane asylum caretaker who carries around a portable straight jacket in their handbag.)

"You don't get to choose your family, and everyone has a right to be productive (Moon-Beam really means “Absent”)," the statement read. "That is why I fight so hard at council for ex-offenders to have jobs."

She added that she also visits inmates at local correctional facilities to "lift and encourage them." (She’s referring to family, ex-mayors, best friends, and all-around shitheads).

“Oh well, I guess Moonbeam couldn’t find any qualified ex-cons for the job so she settled on her brother. This should piss off a lot of ex-cons who paid their dues to society and can’t land a job because they aren’t connected”

THE PRESIDENT GIVES THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND A iPOD.

Mr. "Gadget Man".…

April 1, 2009.............. Aprils Fools Day but this is not a joke.

The President of the USA gave the Queen of England an Ipod for a gift on his latest trip this week to Europe.... Just what every 150 year old woman wants!!!

The Ipod was loaded with..get this..video and photos of her visits to the US and his speeches. Maybe they started with her first visit in 1865 after the Civil War. It also included show tunes from musicals so the queen could listen to music while vacuuming and doing the laundry.

I now fully realize that everyone that works for Obama are idiots! Didn’t anyone think that one of the richest women in the world has a host of royal photographers around whenever she paints her toenails? I can hear the Queen now, “Jeeves, I say, fetch me my Ipod so I can revisit my trip to the colonies to visit with those awful Yanks. And Jeeves, can you replace all of those homo show tunes that terrible Negro gave me with some Madonna and Britney Spears songs? ”

What’s Obama going to give Russia’s Putin?…a Obama chia pet?

Aside from this Blog fun making, the very sad part of this is that the iPod is made in in Longhua, China, which has been nicknamed i-pod city....Amazing...A piece of Chinese crap given to the Queen of England from the President of the United States representing you and me.... President Ronald Reagan is rolling over in his grave...

“Mum…me thinks this chap is a wee bit daft?…hold onto your arse…”